We live in an age with digital video recorders, by which most of us skip commercials. However, in the case of sporting events, they are best viewed live. Which means we are held captive during inning breaks, and over the course of a long baseball season we see many of the same commercials over and over again, dozens of time in some cases.
Here is the first part of my inane ramblings and thoughts of the commercials of the 2010 Dodgers season. Enjoy...
There are so many things wrong with this commercial. First of all, the State Farm guy has easily the most punchable face on television. I don't like that he's always eavesdropping, and what's with one guy taking up a large corner booth in a busy restaurant? Secondly, the dude at the counter bringing a sandwich is taking an inordinate amount of grief from his friends. A little ball-busting is fine, but it's not like this is the only occasion...
Now his buddies are giving him a hard time about saving money on gas? He's already driving, so that should absolve him from his increasingly dickish friends. But it's still not as annoying as the State Farm dude. Just once, I would like the other dudes to break the fourth wall and take out the dude who seems to be talking to nobody in particular. However, State Farm did provide some enjoyable commercials, however...
State Farm: Magic Jingle
The best thing about this commercial is clearly the girl from 4E, who seems surprisingly into the dude with the porn mustache, not to mention nary a question about how she in fact ended up in his apartment. I will admit, I have said "Can I get a hot tub" far too many times than I'd like to admit. Which brings us to the other State Farm "Magic Jingle" ad:
The most memorable thing about this commercial is the Stu Scott eyes of the woman on the right. Speaking of her, she's also in this Captain Morgan commercial:
It's a drink only IVdown could love.
Honda: Mr. Opportunity
There's no doubt in my mind this night ends with that starlet covered in ink. That look in her eyes says it all.
Just For Men - Daddy's Girls
First of all, where do these girls get the nerve to try to set their dad up on a date? I have news for you, girls: that noise that you hear that keeps you up at night is all your fault, because you decided to play matchmaker. Now, dad needs a new headboard for Father's Day.
Second of all, why do they want dad out of the house all of a sudden? There's something nefarious going on here; I'm guessing the girls are the heads of an international drug cartel. Speaking of wanting dad out of the house all of a sudden...
Just For Men: More Ties
Just because you helped dad with his confidence in getting his new job doesn't mean you weren't the reason that mom left. Or maybe...
Acura: Simple Rules
Maybe mom was kicked out of the house because dad couldn't stand her. This woman seems unsatisfied, or at the very least unpleasant. Guess what else you can't have in your car? A man!
This series of three commercials present quite a double standard:
Okay, that was kind of funny. Hahahaha, the man gets put in his place for looking at another woman. Let's move on:
Now, the woman looks at another guy, so here comes the payback. This should be good. Only, this guy is an idiot, thinking that the shaking-the-bottle trick is going to work. The woman chooses the safe beer, then challenges her boyfriend/husband by presenting him with the bottle opener. She clearly has the brains in this relationship. On to part three:
This guy has no balls. They are clearly in a jar on a shelf at home. The smug look on the wife's face (they have to be married, right? There's just too much control here, that someone without an obligation would walk away from in a heartbeat) almost vaults her into C status, with the Acura lady above.
Caesars Palace: Routinely Spectacular
The woman in this commercial is gorgeous, yet it still troubles me. The guy locks himself out of his hotel room, but he decides to make the best of his day. He gets into the pool, no doubt simply following someone with a key card to get past the gates, then enjoys a sauna. I'm willing to overlook this, as it all seems plausible to me. Then, he buys a suit, because apparently even if he did get back into his room he didn't bring clothes for the day.
While buying the suit, he catches the eye of the fetching young lass, and the new smitten couple not only enjoy dinner at Bobby Flay's restaurant, but go see Cher perform as well. Not only that, but the man even plays craps in this elongated version of the commercial, which amplifies her interest in him (the kiss). This was quite a day for the dude who locked himself out of his room. I'm even willing to buy that all this was possible, until that is, the last scene.
The guy still doesn't have his key. We are supposed to believe that this man accomplished all of these things without a wallet, or even a walk to the front desk? Who allows you to purchase a suit by simply saying, "Charge room 1216"? He bought a suit, paid for dinner, got tickets to a show, and got money to play craps all without any form of identification? The only plausible scenario I can buy is that he borrowed several hundred dollars from this woman, then brought her to a different room, only to take off at the last minute without paying her back under the guise of "getting his room key." Well played, sir.
Carl's Jr.: We Don't Do That, Philly Cheesesteak Burger
Hey, did you know in Philadelphia they talk differently? It was funny when John Belushi said "Cheeseburger cheeseburger cheeseburger" 35 years ago; now this is just tired.
AT&T: Rethink Possible
Apparently if you have AT&T you can acquire the gift of psychic powers, and eventually become the 57th President of the United States. I have seen this before, and it ends with Martin Sheen holding a baby up as defense from would-be assassin Christopher Walken.
That's enough for now. I'll have more up later in the week. If there are any commercials that spring to your mind, put them in the comments below.