It's that time of year again. The time when we see the limited creativity of many baseball players. Then again, we see the creativity in others! And I feel that this year's nicknames are a cut above those of last year, even if no nickname hits the peak Rich Hill did with D. Mountain.
While there are more good nicknames, there are still some players who just go with modified, boring versions of their last name.
And let's not talk about how it will be difficult to actually read the nicknames because of MLB's decision to have white-on-white uniforms. Who thought that was a good idea?
Anyway, on to my very scientific rankings broken down by tiers.
The top tier
1. Kristopher Negrón: Negron James
It’s only fitting that Negrón was traded to Los Angeles just for this nickname. An obvious play off of LeBron James Negron said, according to Ken Gurnick at MLB.com, a lot of Latin players thought it was funny and called him that… and that Ryan Ludwick made it a thing in 2014 when they were both on the Reds. Now he could be the first James since Worthy to make the playoffs in Los Angeles*!
2. Matt Beaty: Bater’s Taters
If you just look at his name, you probably think it rhyme with "meaty." Nope! That’s a long "a" sound! Beaty’s college teammates—again according to Gurnick—came up with the nickname. Beaty went to Belmont University in Tennessee and is just the third player from Belmont, and first position player, to ever make the majors. Beaty has 1.1 WAR (Baseball Reference version), while Jerry Bell has 2.6 WAR. Also a Belmont alumni? Dodgers fan and country star Brad Paisley.
Bater’s Taters is awesome and it rhymes.
3. David Freese: DaveHuman
Here's @alannarizzo explaining why David Freese's #playersweekend nickname is "Dave Human."
— Matthew Reichbach (@fbihop) August 7, 2019
Might need a chart. pic.twitter.com/uOJGhOKu1y
4. Jedd Gyorko: Jerk Store
I forget which announcer said it (Joe Davis, I think), but during a game in the Blue Jays series, they said he used the nickname because of demand by his teammates and that he’s a people pleaser.
5. Walker Buehler: Buetane
If Walker Buehler went into professional wrestling, Vince McMahon would have changed his name to Buetane and he’d come out with a singlet with flames on it like Kurt Angle. His finishing move, he’d steal from Jerry "The King" Lawler: The fireball. Last year, Buelher went with "Ferris."
6. Tony Gonsolin: Goooose
"Goose" seems like a pretty good nickname for someone named Gonsolin. But adding another two o’s to the name? That moves it up a tier. Hopefully he posts some goose eggs against the Yankees.
Still great!
8. Dustin May: Big Red
He’s not a big fan of Gingergaard, which makes sense. He probably wants to go his own way, not just be someone associated with another pitcher. Big Red is a pretty good nickname for someone with as much red hair as he does. Per Gurnick, a Double-A teammate gave him the nickname.
9. Ross Stripling: Chicken Strip
We all know he really wants to be "Stripper," but MLB won’t let him do it.
10. Rich Hill: Field of Genes
Last year, Hill had the best nickname in baseball with "D. Mountain." This year, he’s going with Field of Genes to promote his charity.
11. Pedro Baez: La Mula
The Mule.
12. A.J. Pollock: Pollo
According to Gurnick, this is another nickname from Latin teammates, who couldn’t pronounced Pollock’s last name, so they called him Pollo. Or "Chicken." If he had gone with "Pollo Loco," he might have hit hte top three.
Emojis
13. Russell Martin: El
14. Joc Pederson:
Kids these days with their emojis on their phones and stuff. Russell Martin’s is because muscle rhymes with "muscle." Joc Pederson said his nickname is King so he went with the crown emoji. He just went with "King" last year.
Translated
15. Ryu: 류현진
16: Maeda: Maeken
I struggled with where to place these. Ryu’s is his name in Korean. Which is cool he gets to put his name in his language on his back. And Maeken is the equivalent of his initials in Japanese. We’ll put them in the middle of the pack, but I think they could easily be above the "emojis" names.
Kinda cool
17. Yimi Garcia: Villa Trina
The reliever is from Villa Trina in the Dominican Republic, so he’s honoring that with his Players Weekend nickname
18. Kenley Jansen: Kenleyfornia
The same nickname as last year, I had it a lot higher! But it’s still just his name mashed with "California."
Numbers
19. Joe Kelly: 909
The area code from his hometown.
20. Chris Taylor: CT3
His initials and his uniform number.
21: Justin Turner: Redturn2
It’s his Twitter handle. Last year I said he should just go with "Red." With Dustin May as "Big Red," it would have been cool if he went with "Regular Red" or something, but, alas.
Actual nickname
22. Enrique Hernandez: Kiké
It’s his actual nickname! Like, everyone calls him that!
BORING
23. Alex Verdugo: Dugie
24. JT Chargois: Shag
A step above the ones to come, but barely.
REALLY BORING
26. Adam Kolarek: AK
No, his number is not 47. That would be Chargois’ number.
27. Tyler White: Whitey
28. Clayton Kershaw: Kersh
29: Will Smith: Smitty
30. Casey Sadler: Sads
31: Corey Seager: Seags
Nope.
* This is not true at all.
